The Test
by Queen Primrose
Summary: A group of rich people play with Science, they decide to have a Test on the normal-everyday citizen. They end up causing a sickness. Lara is from a group who is trying to find a cure, but she's not sure that she's doing the right thing. Rating may change


**This is not the actual story, just the prolouge and in this case meaning this is after the story.**

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When Lara had killed her she did not think it would lead to this much trouble at all, no she did not know that it would. Had she been cruel to kill her? Yes, she was, but had it been worth it? The answer used to be absolutely but now Lara was not too sure about that. Why had she done it? Simple: to stop the suffering and sickness, but what would have happened if she had not killed her. Would she still be alive or would she be long dead? Lara did not know the answer to that question, but she imagined the answer would be most likely death. Lara had always hated seeing people suffer, so what was better then to stop it earlier than it was supposed to be? Lara really could not have foreseen the trouble it would cause, had she not done the right thing. Yes, she believed so. However, had she really done that? She did not want to get to that question just yet.

Lara could not have been that cruel yes. If she could have foreseen the trouble it would cause she would've changed her decision yes? Of course she would've, Lara wasn't evil she was just trying to do what was right in this world, but like most people she didn't exactly know what was right and wrong. Lara would have been lying if she said that she would have done the same to her own mother, Lara did not posses that much courage as to kill her own blood. Lara just wanted to do what was right for the universe, why did it have to be so hard. Was it the killing itself or the guilt afterwards that made her regret it? She did not know and did not want to know, either way she felt guilty and shameful. Was it the right thing to do anyway? Yes, yes and yes! Lara did not want to feel any more guilt then she had already felt, enough was enough correct? Yes, that was right.

Lara looked out of her window as she watched the birds fly past, they were so free and innocent, had they ever felt guilt before? Probably not, for what could a bird do to another as to feel guilt? Birds and animals were sinless; Virtue and Sin were something of man not animals. She started feeling envious towards the birds, why had they the right to fly so freely? Why were they so innocent of the crimes of man? She had killed and now the pain of that guilt overpowered the reason to do so. If she could turn time back, would she have done the same thing? Maybe yes or maybe no, Lara believed no…she knew it was the right thing to do! She could feel it in her very veins and skin, but then why did it feel so wrong? Maybe it was just her problem, or maybe she felt guilty because she was human, and humans had feelings just like any other being.

She continued to gaze out of the window and to stare at the birds, but now her feelings towards them were different. She praised the birds for their sinless actions, imagine if they too felt the same guilt she felt? It would be horrible would it not? Yes, t would be, Lara thought of the horrible scream that imitated from her friend as she killed her. That was too much to feel anymore was it. Yes, it was and now Lara would stop it for the last time, how would she do that? She looked out of the window again, would it be so hard to jump now that she had killed her friend? Yes because it was she, instantly guilt washed over her once more. How could she even say that now? She had killed and deserved to have the same thing done to her yes? Of course, but Lara like any human or other creatures she feared for her own skin. Was that so wrong? Maybe so but she still felt it.

She continued to gaze outside, the birds were flying together freely and without any pain behind their flights, maybe she felt something she was not supposed to feel. Maybe, but she was a living creature with feelings, guilt was one of those feelings. She felt as though she were lost to the world that she had been born to; it was as though she did not know what to do any more. She finally stood out of her chair and moved towards the balcony, she gazed up at the birds and then down the street. There were no people and why should she expect any? All were mostly long gone or suffering somewhere, she had been a good person for her whole life. She had never felt that kind of guilt or any kind of pain that she felt now, it was horrible and unbearable all the same. She began to feel light, as though she were fading forever.

She began to look at the building across from her, the world did not know of the test that they had committed. The people began appearing onto the dark streets, ignorant of the fact that the world was crawling with the new test. Lara used to believe that they would kill what they have made, but now that she was looking at the world as it is she was not sure what to believe anymore. As she looked at the crumbling world, she knew that there was no hope; unless they saved a few humans in a secret area, the world would have no more of their species. Maybe it would be best that way, maybe it was best the world was ruled by creatures who could not commit Sin. As she gazed at the world…no the world but what remained of her world she could not help feeling light, if she was going to die so soon she was going to try making sure no guilt remains when she does.

Lara was a lost person, meaning one who could not find their way among all the rights and wrongs of this world. However, there was an answer to what was right and wrong; did not humans have brains and heart? What of their feelings and beliefs? Surely, there was something to guide them, if not then what of their nature? She thought about this as she took a deep breath, if this world was able to come back to what it used to be then she would have nothing to do anymore. If only she had not killed her. What if that was all just a big trick to see. How far could she go? No it could not be, for they were in desperate need of people like her and her friend. However, would they do anything in the name of science and knowledge? Yes, they might, but would they sacrifice a good tool for just a small test? Maybe they could go that far, she herself had seen how far.

She had had enough of this thinking, there were important things to do than sit and think was there not? Yes, there was, _but even more important than thinking about a lost friend… _no it was more important; the completely human race needed her and others' help! _However, if she were there would not she have been doing the same? _No, she would be thinking about her and what she might have done to stop it. Lara sat back down, not even aware that she had been standing a few seconds ago. How had she turned from a shy and good person, to a careless and senseless person? The human race could wait for another day could not it. The thought brought back more guilt, was it indeed selfish from her to waste time on herself rather than saving lives? Maybe, but just because other people could not save themselves did not mean she had to stop caring for herself!

Another swipe of guilt, but how could I care about people at the same time try to sort my own feelings and thoughts? I was not more important then other people but I was also just as important either, so what was driving so much guilty feelings towards her? Maybe I am going crazy, or maybe I just miss you my friend and I am so sorry…Lara felt her eyes water with tears, she forced them back down but still they blurred her vision. She closed her eyes and began to count, one...the feeling of tears still burned her eyes…2...her blurred vision didn't subside in the least…3...she couldn't take it anymore! Therefore, she let them run down her face in waves, she felt herself shake slightly until she was sobbing with her hands covering her face from view. Why have I done such a thing?! Why had I killed you when I could have let you live?! Why?! Why?!

She began to calm down slightly; she was still shaken by all the sobbing that she needed to let out. The little snitches of guilt were now downright waves of guilt rather then subside they had overpowered her. She looked around her and found that she was still sitting on the chair; she looked out at the sky and saw the birds flying overhead. She felt angry with herself for letting her guard down, but then she felt shame at feeling angry with herself for letting her guard down. She looked back at the city and felt a fresh new wave of courage, the guilt would always remain but now she must face the universe once more. She took a deep breath before she began walking away from the chair, then she passed through the apartment's open door without looking back. When she reached the bottom of the stair she took another deep breath, it was time to face this stinking world once more.

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